Tuesday 8 December 2009

Wank Week


It's impossible to overestimate the importance of the Copenhagen summit. Biased BBC's leading social commentator Martin treats it with the seriousness it deserves, bestowing his highest honours on the event - rent boys, wanking and poo.


God it's only day 1 and you can't get away from Climate Change.


That climate. It gets everywhere.


The BBC are almost masturbating live on TV.


It is a seminal moment.


Last time 20,000 beeboids got so excited was when they were told there were 6 new 12 year old Albanian rent boys on Hampstead Heath.


Be fair. Hampstead is a low-carbon excursion from Islington. That's why they're happy.


I can't believe this crap is going on for two weeks.


That's a long time to spend on the toilet, Martin. Even for you.


I was even informed by Christine Bleakley that we should all go veggie


Roughage helps.


(although she appears to be enjoying a bit of meat from Chelsea these days)


Life's unfair. She should enjoy a pudding like you.


so I can't wait to see what's on the menu at Copenhagen. Muesli and rice I think not.


CRUdités, Martin. Followed by sour grapes.


5 comments:

  1. Not sure Martin would go down well at Copenhagen. They're allergic to nuts.

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  2. Crudités at Copenhagen? Presumably without the oil?

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  3. I doubt that Martin has accorded Copenhagen his highest honours. No inbred goat-herders for one thing, nor camp Campbell. He couldn't even be bothered to sniff out any cocaine. Mark him as unimpressed.

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  4. Christine Bleakley is hot.

    I'd go veggie on her recommendation, if I wasn't veggie already.

    Martin must be gay or something.

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  5. Back to Climate Change today;
    "So far, the BBC is totally silent on the Copenhagen Climate Challenge, an open letter to the UN signed by 141 leading international scientists who work in relevant fields."

    141 leading international scientists like, er, David Bellamy. Cuddly face of BBC nature programmes in the 80's. Not a peer reviewed climatologist as far as I'm aware.

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